Dark Novels for Teens - Not the Problem

Recently a woman by the name of Meghan Cox Gurdon wrote an article titled 'Darkness Too Visible'. In the article, she speaks about YA novels and how they have content that is much too dark for teen readers. What disturbed me about it was not the fact that she wants to protect the children, but the fact that she seems to attack the writers as well as publishers. If you haven't read it, you should check it out and see what I mean.

I wanted to speak my opinions on this topic because I feel that sometimes adults lock themselves into the illusion that teens don't see and experience violence, which is completely absurd. By the time I reached middle school, 8th grade to be exact, my school held a class on sexual abuse. The girls and boys were separated, and in the room of only girls and speakers, we were all asked to write down if we had been sexually abused before, keep it anonymous, and turn it in. When the guest speakers read the results, over 60% had been abused sexually.

By the time I reached high school, I knew in my heart that everything I had been taught about the justice system was a lie. A cruel joke, with only the innocent at the butt of it. Sadly, I had friends that were beaten everyday. CPS only got involved if one of the kids was hospitalized and then they always gave the kids back. Other friends were raped or molested by parents, neighbors, step parents, friends, I knew of much drug use, cutting, suicide attempts, drug overdoses resulting in death, and yet in very few cases was anything ever done to help these kids.

This is the truth of our society. If we don't speak about, and ignore these things, then they will never change. Being ignorant of something doesn't mean it doesn't exist. Writing about these things does not make them happen more. It only makes the problem that already existed, 'known'.

Another issue that I feel many adults overlook is that kids today are much more aware of things that when I was younger.  My 6 yr old is already asking where babies come from. By 3 he wanted to know why we died, got married, lived away from our families, had to go to school, why people hurt one another and why we don't take care of animals and the Earth better. He was 3! :-) So, suffice it to say, kids are by no means ignorant to the ways of the world. We absolutely live in dark times, and the longer that we as humans deny that fact, the longer it will be before we stop it.

As parents, mentors, teachers, aunts and uncles, or whoever you might be to a child, we do have to be careful what we expose them to. No doubt... But that means that we actually have to 'be' parents. Or mentors, or educators. That means that we listen more than we speak, and it means that kids come first over everything else.

Children, no matter the age, need to know they come first in everything. Not when work is over, or the night out playing DND is done. That does not mean we can hit them, cuss at them, or abuse them, and then expect them not to turn to sources like these books later in life. If there is any fault to be placed where these dark novels are concerned, it is with us all as a society.

I am willing to bet that most of the people who are drawn to these books have been through some sort of trauma themselves already. They are merely reaching out and trying to find answers. And though I do understand one point of the article, which spoke about a Dad being concerned that his daughter would begin cutting herself again after seeing the book cover with a cut arm, I can say with some certainty that the image will not be the cause if someone is to go back to cutting. Believe me, I know from experience.

The root of self mutilation has much more to do with being disconnected and emotionally numb, than it does seeing an image of cut marks on an arm. If a picture can take a young woman back to cutting herself, then she was never cured in the first place. So as much as I understand that father's concern, I think he may have missed the boat... If she isn't cured, then you need to get to the root of why she is doing it.

I had a mother email me a few months ago wanting to know how to keep her daughter, who is now about 16, from becoming cynical in life. At first, I was totally shocked that she would come to me. I hardly know her. But then I thought about it and realized that I became cynical of the world when I saw injustice. The more I saw, the more cynical I became. My suggestion to her was to find out something her daughter is passionate about. And I made sure to add, 'this does not include sports, games, hanging out, or things like that...', I told her to really get to the root of how her daughter feels on major topics, and then to get her involved.

If she was bothered by the crisis of global warming, get her involved in awareness campaigns. If she has friends who were beaten and nothing done, help her find her voice so she can stand up for her friends. These things are not rocket science, they only take time. Time that has become so precious for those who must work multiple jobs to stay afloat.

That is why I don't feel we need to handle these things alone. We, as a society, need to step up. Dark YA novels are the least of our worldly concerns at the moment, and being 'opinionated' over whether or not youngsters should be reading this stuff, is not going to do you a lick of good. Because many of these authors have been through the same things as the readers are going through, and finally... Someone is speaking up about it.

Just my thoughts... Sending love and peace to you all. :-)